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GROUPOCALYPSE NOW!

GROUPOCALYPSE NOW!

BREAKING: Hipsters Use Groupon

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The Dastardly Dreaded Groupon Effect strikes again! Over the fourth quarter of last year, American Apparel, that purveyor of domestic made goods for the would-be “fat hooker” market, racked up impressive sales. But that doesn’t mean they’re seeing the profits.

According to the New York Post, a flurry of Groupon discounts nationwide cut into margins. Despite doing a brisk business selling daily deals on “cardigans, corduroys and sexy leggings,” the Groupon offering may have cut American Apparel’s profits by nearly half last year. Read More

GROUPOCALYPSE NOW!

The Inevitable Groupon Stock Apocalypse is Here, and The Face Of It is Some Drunk Kid We Met at a House Party

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Remember that time that one daily deals company IPO’d, and everyone was really excited about it, except for those crazy, mean naysayers (like Google searches for it) who were like, “this will not end well because Groupon is basically a very sophisticated Ponzi scheme” and made flow charts that may have suggested this?

Well, guess what? Today, those people are eating Correct Sandwiches for lunch. Read More

GROUPOCALYPSE NOW!

The Groupon (GRPN) IPO Day 1 Liveblog!

Groupon IPO at 1:52 PM

Apologies for not starting sooner, but certain members of Betabeat have spent the morning in their boxer-briefs breathing into a paper bag in the fetal position, as they burn printed out Groupons and smudge sage over a well-adorned shrine to Groupon Cat and Skanda.

Either way, we’re well into Groupon’s first day on the NASDAQ as a publicly traded company, and BetaBeat will be liveblogging the IPO for the rest of  the day, all the way through next Friday.

Yes folks, we’ll be giving you updates in arbitrary chronological marks as this thing keeps going through it’s first week. But for now, let’s get to Day 1. Read More

GROUPOCALYPSE NOW!

Early Groupon Trading Makes Mockery of Tech Bloggers’ Mockery

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Damn you, Groupon cat. You just ate our canary. In early trading today, Groupon shares rose as high as 46 percent above its higher-than-expected $20 IPO price, up to $29.99.

That pop sound you heard happened just a few minutes after trading. By 11 a.m., however, it was down to $25.90.  The other aspect of early trading that caught the smug Groupon haterade drinkers by surprise was that they sold 35 million shares, raising $700 million. Read More

GROUPOCALYPSE NOW!

The Groupon IPO Guessing Contest: Win a Cookie!

GROUPON CAT WILL GO TO THE CLUURB THIS WEEKEND, WILL BUY BOTTLE SERVICE STILL, JUST NOT FOR EVERYONE.

Groupon’s IPO is going to be priced sometime today! It goes on sale tomorrow. THE MOST IMPORTANT IPO IN DAILY DEALS HISTORY IS FINALLY HERE, HAROLD CAMPING! So, we’re having a contest. Here’s how it works:

1. Betabeat will make guesses on the IPO, both the IPO price and the price at day’s end.

2. If any of your guesses are closer to the actual IPO than Betabeat’s, we will give you a cookie. A real cookie.

3. No cheating, no going to the future and finding out what it is, no insider trading, no guesses from Andrew Masons, Groupon Cats, or Pets.com dogs. Read More