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Go Home Science You're Drunk

Go Home Science You're Drunk

Genetically Modified ‘Sparkling’ Apple Has Juice Like a Fizzy Drink

It looks like a pretty standard apple, except for the whole fizziness thing. (Lubera)

Good news for neckbeards, and anyone else whose daily caloric intake is primarily comprised of soda: a carbonated apple — yes, like an actual, physical, apple — now exists.

Devised by the mad scientists at Swiss fruit company Lubera, the so-called “Paradis Sparkling Apple” releases fizzy juice when an eater bites into it. The culinary miracle was the result of cross-breeding two different apple varieties — the Resi and the Pirouette — and took a number of years to perfect, according to the Daily Mail. Read More

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Study: Kids Who Play Video Games For an Hour a Day Are Happier, More Social

Healthy, apparently. (Getty)

Prepare to question everything you once thought was true, because science is now claiming that kids who play video games for up to an hour per day are happier and more sociable than those who don’t play at all. So much for human interaction!

The Oxford University study polled around 5,000 boys and girls between the ages of 10 and 15 who spend varying amounts of time playing video games, the Telegraph reportsRead More

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People Who Binge Drink Are More Popular, Science Says

A room of very, very cool people, apparently. (Wikipedia)

Go grab the nearest alcohol vaporizer, because it’s been proven that binge drinkers are cooler than all their friends.

Men and women who frequently participate in heavy drinking tend to have higher social standings within their friend groups, the Daily Beast reports. The study, called Drinking to Reach the Top (guess we’ll have to rename our autobiography), is scheduled to appear in the October issue of Addictive Behaviors. Read More

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Biologists Name New Water Mite Species After Jennifer Lopez

J.Lo the human (not the water mite). (Wikipedia)

It’s cool to win a Grammy or go platinum or get a dumb guest role on an episode of Glee, but nowadays the true mark of musical achievement is having a gross-looking bug named after you.

Jennifer Lopez has become the namesake of a new species of water mite found near Puerto Rico, the AP reports. Biologists named the mite Litarachna lopezae not just because Ms. Lopez has Puerto Rican heritage, but also because they rocked out (as biologists do) to her music as they wrote about their discovery. Read More

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Chinese Volunteers Eat Mealworms For 105 Days To See If They’d Make Good Astronaut Food

DINNER TIME. (Wikimedia Commons)

What a week it’s been for space travel! Yesterday, we told you about the Israeli group that’s trying to send the Torah to the moon. Now, let us share with you the tale of three Chinese volunteers who ate bugs for three months to see if they’d make good astronaut food.

For 105 days, three Chinese volunteers lived in a sealed-off biosphere and ate a diet consisting mainly of mealworms, the Daily Mail reports. Read More

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Terrifying New Wasp Species Named After Harry Potter Creature

The Ampulex dementor. (Ohl et al.)

After a round of public voting, a newly-discovered Thai wasp species has officially been named Ampulex dementor, inspired by the soul-sucking dementors in Harry Potter.

Dementors — for those who don’t live and breathe fictional wizardry — are hooded, flying creatures that suck victims’ souls out through their mouths, leaving them cold, lifeless shells of their former selves. Read More

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Kids Become Psychos When They Bite Chunks Out of Food, Science Says

Kids being k-k-kraaaazy (Wikimedia Commons)

Sometimes, when there’s nothing on TV and all its friends are busy, Science gets really bored and comes up with experiments like this: do kids act more aggressively when they bite chunks out of their food with their front teeth, or when their food is cut up?

Apparently, kids who use their teeth to tear off bites of food tend to behave twice as aggressively as those who eat food cut up with a knife and fork, the Daily Mail reports. Read More