(Photo: 9 to 5 Mac)

Just this weekend we were sitting around wondering when exactly someone would create another Steve Jobs biopic. We already have the indie one starring Ashton Kutcher and the fast-talking, sure-to-be-sexist incarnation dreamt up by Aaron Sorkin. What we really need is a third one that can make fun of the other two.

Luckily Funny or Die has come to our rescue, announcing that they'll be putting a full-length comedic biopic about Mr. Jobs online on April 15th.

The "60 to 75 minute" film is called iSteve and will star Justin Long, he of Mac commercial fame, as Mr. Jobs, and Hurley from Lost as Woz. Sadly, John Hodgman (a.k.a. PC) won't be playing Steve "Sweaty" Ballmer, which we think is a real oversight.

"In true Internet fashion, it’s not based on very thorough research — essentially a cursory look at the Steve Jobs Wikipedia page,” Ryan Perez, the film's director, told The New York Times.

There, there, Ashton.

(Photo: Top News)

Marissa Mayer introduced Yahoo users to a "new, more modern experience" for finding "the best of the web" in a blog post early this morning. [Yahoo]

Ever dream of founding the next Apple, Facebook or Twitter? That might be a long shot. But if you act fast, you can probably get your computer hacked by visiting the same website that compromised the recently-hacked tech giants. [AllThingsD]

“We used to have these ads, I’m a Mac and I’m a PC, and the Mac was always the cool guy,” Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak told Bloomberg. “And ouch, it’s painful, because we kind of are losing that.”[Bloomberg]

Apple's lead designer Jonathan Ive dropped some knowledge on a British children's television show. [Quartz]

"You cannot be cross-shopped on Amazon is like e-com 2.0," said Thrillist CEO Ben Lerer. [PandoDaily]

Mr. Zuckerberg, please collect your chump change. (Photo: ITechBook.net)

However broke the state of California may be, it's also sitting on a treasure trove of unclaimed property that's valued at over $6 billion. Holders like "corporations, business associations, financial institutions, and insurance companies" are required to report any unclaimed property annually to the state comptroller's office. That means if you've forgotten about bank account contents or uncashed money orders, they're sitting around with the comptroller.

Houston Rockets quantitative analyst Christopher Long searched the database for some bold-faced names and came up with some pretty amusing results. For one, Google cofounder Sergey Brin is apparently owed paychecks from Stanford University worth over $1,000. (No word on whether Rockets player and Harvard grad Jeremy Lin helped sift through the bold-faced names.)

Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak has a $269 check waiting for him from the California Automobile Association, and the state of Pennsylvania appears to owe Tesla Motors founder Elon Musk $408.

The most interesting, however, is that according to the comptroller, PayPal owes Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg $308.62. The address listed on the form is for 1743 Westbrook Ave. in Los Altos, CA, the house Zuck and Co. rented [PDF] while building Facebook. As a struggling entrepreneur in 2004-2005, he probably could've used that money.

Misters Zuck, Brin, Woz and Musk can fill out a Claim Affirmation Form to collect their money, though we're guessing it's chump change to the cadre of millionnaires at this point.

Hehe. (Photo: Belfast Telegraph)

In order to commemorate the 15th anniversary of tech news haven Slashdot, the "news for nerds" site invited Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak* to answer a few questions from its community members. The majority of questions revolved around Mr. Wozniak's opinions on the current tech ecosystem, including what excites him about technology and where he goes to "satiate his inner tinkerer."

One offbeat question, however, engendered an equally offbeat answer. When asked what his favorite joke is, Mr. Wozniak replied:

Too many jokes to have a favorite....I had favorite jokes in the days before PC but they were mostly Polish jokes. The Polish American Congress, inc. threatened me with lawsuits for defaming Polish people. I asked if it was ok to tell them as Italian jokes instead and they said, "fine."

I told a joke at the Engineering graduation at U. Colorado, Boulder once to point out how people don't think logically. Q: What do you call four Mexicans in Quicksand? A: Quatro cinco (sinko). It doesn't stereotype or demean Mexicans. It's a funny use of words. But I got told that I had offended 400 people.

Mr. Wozniak clarified by saying that he just likes to make jokes in different languages.

Maybe you should introduce Mr. Wozniak to your semi-culturally insensitive grandpa. We have a feeling they'd get along.

*Super important and highly relevant disclosure: This reporter's cat, Woz, is named after Steve Wozniak.

Mr. Wozniak. (Photo: flickr.com/koeln_de)

There is a certain level of unenviable überfame at which every utterance and twitch merits a headline. Steve Jobs sent an email! Mark Zuckerberg wore a hoodie! On this plane of celebrity, every step is a statement.

Apple cofounder Steve Wozniak is one such überfamous personality. (We even covered the time he made $781 working from home.) Essentially retired, Mr. Wozniak, or Woz, as he's lovingly called, is good-natured enough not to mind being used as a proxy for the tight lips at Apple. He also has a low filter between his brain and his mouth. Repeatedly shunned by his former cofounder, Mr. Wozniak continued to speak out—about the white iPhone, about Bing, about whatever—and made multiple appearances on reality TV. We noticed that today, the Woz is featured in no fewer than three stories on Google News, partly due to a speaking tour in Australia. Roundup time!

1. "I don't have home internet, admits Apple founder Steve Wozniak," The Telegraph

Mr. Wozniak does not have Internet at home because his Internet provider is the cable company, which is a monopoly.

2. "Apple Founder Wozniak to Buy Facebook Regardless of Price," Bloomberg

It's unclear whether Woz will actually buy Facebook shares, but he certainly would in the hypothetical, he tells Bloomberg.

3. "Wozniak glad he never had to run Apple," ARN

Boy, is Woz glad he never ran Apple. Dodged a bullet on that one.

4. "Woz backs Apple Aussie price revolt," TechEye

IPhones are too expensive in Australia, Woz says, possibly due to protectionism and tariffs, or Apple price gouging.

5. "Woz Digs Windows Phone, But LG Doesn't," Information Week

Woz likes the tiles on the new Nokia Lumia 900.

6. "EXCLUSIVE: Steve Wozniak In Line For IPad 3 At Apple Store (VIDEO)," What's Trending

Woz has to wait in line for his iPads just like you.

7. "Woz supports Mike Daisey's message and says you should too," CNET

Woz strays from the party line on the Apple ankle-biter, whom he praised to Mr. Jobs.

8. "Apple Stock to Hit $1,000? Steve Wozniak Believes So," CNBC

Woz doesn't really follow the stock market, but he believes Apple will hit $1,000 a share.

9. "Wozniak: Tablet is the PC for 'normal people,'" ComputerWorld

Tablets are like TVs, Woz says, and they represent what Apple was all about from the beginning.

10. "Wozniak sorry he called ‘Dancing’ show ‘fake,’" MSNBC

Woz was upset about placing in the bottom two on "Dancing With the Stars," but he's calmed down now.

twitter.com/stevewoz

Apple co-founder, engineering whiz and certified 'bear' Steve Wozniak normally only tweets from Foursquare: "John Vink's Monday dinner club. Atkins friendly here. They let you scrape off and eat just the topping! http://4sq.com/nILZSB;" "Filet and lobster. (@ Ruth's Chris Steak House w/ @myhf) http://4sq.com/q0tLMZ" and so on.

But today Mr. Wozniak reminded us that it doesn't matter if you're a millionaire--nothing beats working from home!

The missive--"I made $781 today working a few hour from home check this out! http://ix.gd/xw5xvxxdaxi"--was quickly deleted. We missed it, but several folks caught Woz's slip-of-the-tweet around 4:30 p.m., in which he linked to obvious internet scam Online Internet Solutions:

"I basically make $6,000-$8,000 a month online."- Kelly Richards

I asked her about how she started her remarkable journey. "It was pretty easy, I filled out a short form and got immediate access to the Online Income Solutions. I got the Kit and within a month I was making over $4,000 a month. Its really simple, I am not a computer whiz, but I can use the internet. I fill forms and surf sites, I don't even have to sell anything and nobody has to buy anything."

Online giant Google, worth over 100 billion dollars is the most used search engine and internet market place. Google is the #1 internet site in the world, over 50 percent of all internet traffic flows through them everyday. Using Google and the other search engines to make money online has been a eye-opener for Kelly.

There are plenty of scams on the internet claiming you can make $50,000 a month, but that is exactly what they are scams. From my conversation with Kelly, "I am making a good salary from home, which is amazing, under a year ago I was jobless in a horrible economy. I thank God every day that I filled out that form."

Quickly, Kelly Richards was able to use the simple Online Income Solutions to make it out of the recession.

The links go to an absurdly-long manifesto about how you can make hundreds of dollars a day--the exact amount is different on every page--posting links by generating quick-and-dirty websites. Wait a second, we have to pay $49.95 for a "Kit"?

It seems Woz fell prey to one of the irritatingly-effective phishing scams on Twitter. (See, people who made fun of this reporter at parties? It can happen to anybody.) You're not the only one, Woz. Now that he's been got, it's likely the virus will spread that much more effectively--who would think a link to a "picture of you" from the great and powerful Wizard of Woz would be a scam?

"It is a great alternative to getting a vasectomy." (Actual Woz Quote)

The Observer broke the story a few weeks back about Fei Lam, the 17-year old kid from Queens who sold more than $130,000 worth of parts for the unreleased white iPhone 4.

Last week Steve Wozniak revealed his personal copy of the white iPhone 4. At first major outlets like CNN assumed he got special privleges because, well, he co-founded Apple.

But Woz admitted in an email today that he got his white iPhone 4 just like the rest of the world, by buying a conversion kit from Fei Lam's website, whiteiphone4now.com.

Apple blog 9to5mac jumped on this admission to call Woz's white iPhone a fake. But that's not exactly true. The most likely scenario? Apple had parts made for the white iPhone 4, but for unknown reasons, decided they were unhappy with them and scrapped the release.

These spare parts made their way onto the grey market, where they were snapped up by Fei Lam.

So the parts are genuine Apple iphone components, they are just from a version of the white iPhone 4 that has not been, and never will be, released.

Which, when you stop to think about it, kinda makes this version all the more rare and desirable.

Check out the original Fei Lam story and Apple's follow up here >

While you're waiting for that white iPhone 4, check out the Top Ten Tech Breakthroughs We're Still Waiting For.

bpopper [at] observer.com | @benpopper