Fresh Capital

Some Kid in Silicon Valley Just Raised $25M in Seed Money for Something Called ‘Clinkle’

To be fair, money is pretty dirty. (Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images)

Hey, if you felt a faint disturbance in the force this morning, here’s why: Lucas Duplan, a kid barely old enough to drink, just raised a $25 million seed round for his stealth payments startup, which is called “Clinkle.” According to AllThingsD, the company is telling everyone it’s the largest seed round in Silicon Valley history.

Pay no attention to the ghost of Color Labs hovering in the corner of the conference room.

The name, according to Business Insider, “comes from the sound change makes and its ability to turn into a verb (‘Clink this!’).” When will someone launch a startup dedicated to finding better startup names? Read More


Booting Up: The Media Seems to Have Misplaced Edward Snowden

Good morning, sunshine! (Photo:

Hulu’s up for sale, and depending on the buyer, it could mean big, big changes for the site. [New York Times]

After reports that Edward Snowden would be fleeing from Moscow to Havana today via Aereoflot, several reporters bought tickets and showed up–only too discover, too late, that Mr. Snowden wasn’t on the plane. They’re still stuck on the flight for Cuba. We’re guessing they no longer find Carmen Sandiego jokes very funny.  [Gawker]

Kevin Systrom says Instagram will come to Windows Phone and Blackberry before Google Glass. And it took them a veritable eternity just to get to Android. [Fast Company]

“Are we embracing a soft xenophobia applied to a sector rather than a race, to some cohesive elite tech class that doesn’t exist outside of our own minds?” [SF Gate]

The Bitcoin Foundation has gotten a cease and desist from the state of California. [Forbes]

Shut Up and Take My Money

Here Is the Perfect Christie’s Auction for the Engineer With More Money Than Sense

$$$$$ (Photo: Christie's)

Looks like we found yet another place to spend those ever-escalating engineering salaries: chichi Christie’s just announced “First Bytes: Iconic Technology From the Twentieth Century.” It’s an online-only auction of rare tech gadgets, including an Apple-1 made by the Woz himself in 1976, long before his days of kicking it with Kimye. Read More

Silicon Valley Dispatches

Bratty Twitter Employees Exposed Via Twitter

Just your typical Twitter employee. (Screengrab: Twitter)

Vine might end up on App Death Row thanks to Instagram’s new video feature, but don’t feel too bad for the folks at parent company Twitter. If @twentitled is any indication, the biggest problem on their plates is too much steak and caviar.

The @twentitled account is allegedly run by a real-life Twitter staffer. In the same vein as @GSElevator and @CondeElevator, it chronicles overheard complaints and first-world problems of Twitter staffers. Read More

Meanwhile Back at the Valley

Fitter, Happier, More Productive: Silicon Valley Just Can’t Get Enough Inner Peace

(Photo By Justin Sullivan/Getty Images)

Do you ever look at a centuries-old spiritual practice and think, “Huh, how can I use this to make myself a better employee of Google?” Apparently someone does: Wired reports that meditation and mindfulness are the hottest thing going in Silicon Valley.

Googlers are signing up in droves for “Search Inside Yourself” training, and the company has instituted “mindfulness lunches.” Facebook and Twitter apparently have “regular in-office meditation sessions and arranging for work routines that maximize mindfulness.” Read More

Lobby 2.0

Silicon Valley Pushes For Immigration Because Americans Aren’t That Good at Stuff

Can't code? Turn around. (Photo: Wikimedia)

America may be the land of the free (relatively, like compared to North Korea), but it’s also apparently the home of the lazy.

Big Silicon Valley tech companies are stepping up lobbying efforts for immigration reform — not because their hearts bleed for the impoverished, but because we Yanks just aren’t cutting it vis-a-vis tech savvy. According to Reuters: Read More

Sex and the Valley

Newsflash: Silicon Valley Founders Still Overwhelmingly White and Asian Dudes

Not actually a tech job. (Photo: Getty)

In news of the complete and total bummer variety, new numbers show that founders of California tech companies are still overwhelmingly white guys. But hey, it’s not a total monoculture: Asian men fare well in Silicon Valley, too.

The stats come courtesy of Catherine Bracy, who spoke yesterday at the Personal Democracy tech conference. She moved to San Francisco to run Team Obama’s technology field office in 2012, Mother Jones reports. When she arrived, she was struck by the “jarring inequality visible everywhere in Silicon Valley — between rich and poor, between men and women, between white people and, well, everyone else.” Read More

Parker Parade

Sean Parker Says No, His Wedding Didn’t Wreck the Redwoods

Sean Parker and Alexandra Lenas at their hobbit wedding (via Business Insider)

Like the proverbial knight in shining armor, Sean Parker is riding to the defense of his own wedding. In response to the charges that his event basically trashed a redwood forest in Big Sur, he wrote a heartfelt letter to the Atlantic, which originally uncovered the report alleging damages.

For starters? “First and foremost is that nobody goes out of their way to get married in a redwood forest unless they really love redwood forests.” He continues: Read More

Sex and the Valley

Marc Andreessen Helps Us Understand Why Silicon Valley Investors Flock to ‘Cougar Night’ at the Rosewood

(Photo: Charlie Rose)

The Rosewood Hotel on Sand Hill Road, conveniently nestled near almost every important VC firm in the Valley, has long been a hotspot for wealthy VCs to meet potential mates. This is due in part to love concierge Amy Andersen, founder of the super stealth matchmaking company Linx Dating. She helped cultivate an unofficial “Cougar Night” at the hotel after setting up a meet-and-greet there for her wealthy clients in 2009. Read More