faith in humanity restored
the robots are coming
Here’s a story that’ll make you hate humanity a little less: an Oklahoma farmer lost his phone last fall, only to have it returned to him nine months later — from Japan.
Kevin Whitney, of Chickasha, Okla., lost his iPhone last October when it fell out of his pocket into his grain pit — which contained 280,000 pounds of grain — and then was whisked up the grain elevator, KFOR reports. We guess that’s like the farming equivalent of leaving your phone in a cab.
There’s a polite way and a not-so-polite way to lose a government election. The polite way is to congratulate your opponent and bow out gracefully. The not-so-polite way is to accuse your opponent of being a robot.
The latter is happening in Oklahoma right now, where Timothy Ray Murray, a wannabe member of the U.S. House of Representatives, is contesting recent election results on the grounds that his opponent, incumbent Frank Lucas, was secretly executed in Ukraine and replaced by a robot body double. Mr. Murray, who lost the election with a measly 5.2 percent of votes, seems to think his revelations could give him another shot at the title.