Dan D'Addario profiles Julia Allison for this week's Observer:

"I’m a total geek. I love tech guys. I just want to roll around in Silicon Valley. I’m some bizarre combination. It’s not reality television but I relate to but a combination of Zooey Deschanel on New Girl combined with Lena Dunham."

Silicon Valley, you've been warned.

Read the full story to find out more about Ms. Allison's new Bravo reality series Miss Advised, why she's shutting down Nonsociety and what she loves about Silicon Valley. Wonder if any tech founders will be joining her on the show?

(elitedaily.com)

As we all know, the Facebook IPO is upon us. One of the things This Means For You: legions of unpaid amateurs are going to be taking to their various social media outlets at their own risk to then endanger the rest of human populace with their patently unfunny insights (as opposed to those like us, who are paid, professional, and therefore, licensed to distribute merely mediocre "humor" ostensibly disguised as insight about the Facebook IPO). And we have now found the single least funny, and moreover, patently unfunnyTweet about the Facebook IPO out there.

Julia Allison, Wired centerfold, friend to Randi Zuckerbergs everywhere, and internet Mothra birthed from the loins of Nick Denton and Gawker circa 2008, please come collect your prize:

Let's take a brief moment to understand why this is so patently unfunny to the point where it is detrimental to humankind:

1. It's difficult to tell if she's joking or not.
2. If she is joking, than she's asserting the idea that the world's media may be over-saturating the news with Facebook IPO talk. Which is both (A) a given and (B) also kind of incorrect, seeing as how this IPO and it's success or failure in both the short and longterm will indeliably change the course of the way people, markets, and companies who are considering the kind of scale Facebook has achieved go about their business.
3. If she is not joking—and at least one person doesn't think she is—than she is clearly disconnected from this world in a way that prompts questions about what remote island she's been living on, and how one manages the work of being on a Bravo TV show from there (what actually may go into doing such a thing). Either way, yes, Facebook has been covered, to be kind, thoroughly much for the last few years.
4. Indignation marked by multiple question marks and exclamation points.

That said, being as unfunny as this is, it could also be her sly way of marking of press for her new show—something on Bravo about the Internet and dating, we presume—in which case, Andy Cohen, you are a terrible genius and we hate you for falling into your trap.

Otherwise, Twitter should learn from Facebook and begin to systematically remove and ban people for doing this like this on their service. Just every once in a while. Like humor eugenics! I'd get in early and go long on that.

A lot of people would.

fkamer@observer.com | @weareyourfek

(internetweekny.com)

Unless you've gone off the grid, you probably already know that Internet Week 2012 launches on Monday. But with a dizzying number of events to attend, it's hard to figure out which ones are worth the time, effort and subway fare. Betabeat guest blogger Gary Sharma, something of an events truffle hound, already penned his personal list of recommendations. But consider this Betabeat's official to-do list: blogger tested, Betabeat approved.

The Art of Apps Gallery Opening
Monday, May 14th, 10am-6pm
138 Sullivan St.

Expect a lot of rounded edges and pixel talk at this gallery opening, featuring the designs of tech types like Path's Dave Morin, Jon Slimak of Piictu and Matias Corea of Behance. The exhibit will feature some of the best UI designs for apps on iPhone and iPad.

NYU ITP Spring 2012 Show
Monday, May 14th, 5pm-8pm
721 Broadway, 4th Floor

We write about ITP a lot (see the Listserve, the Descriptive Camera, and Kickstriker for some recent examples), mostly because the majority of projects produced by the students at NYU's interactive telecommunications program are actually really, really cool. ITP will unveil its best projects to the public in a two-day spring show on Monday 5/14 and Tuesday 5/15, and we think it's worth attending if only for the chance to see most of the most nimble young minds in the city at work.

Choosey Netizens Choose GIF: Analyzing an Animated Cultural Lexicon
Tuesday, May 15, 12pm-12:45pm
82 Mercer St.

We are huge fans of animated GIFs. In fact, we would probably devolve into communicating entirely through tiny moving pictures, if we could. Motherboard deputy editor Sean Yeaton will discuss how the GIF became its own cultural phenomenon.

Why Being a Good CEO has Nothing to Do With Being a Woman
Tuesday, May 15, 1pm-1:45pm
82 Mercer St.

If you haven't noticed, all of the full-time staff writers here at Betabeat possess two X chromosomes, so we're never ones to turn down a good panel about our fellow XX in tech. Featuring Birchbox cofounder Hayley Barna and Nestio CEO Caren Maio, in addition to some other talented lady founders, the discussion should offer some helpful advice on leading as a woman in the tech community.

TIME Inc.’s 10 Startups to Watch
Wednesday, May 16, 6:30pm-8:30pm
Top Secret

The list of TIME's 10 startups to watch reads like a week in Betabeat posts: NYC tech scene favs Code Academy, Art.sy, Fab.com and Side Tour are among the honorees. But the event is invite-only so be sure to get on the guest list if you want to attend.

WeWorkLabs Happy Hour
Wednesday, May 16, 5pm-8pm
175 Varick St., 4th Floor

First off: there will be free beer at this event. Plus, you'll get to check out the coworking space of WeWorkLabs, a NYC tech staple that seeks to foster collaboration between up-and-coming entrepreneurs. Check out some of the pitches from WeWorkLabs members and network with other like-minded techies.

hackNY Fundraiser
Wednesday, May 16, 7pm-9pm
foursquare HQ: 568 Broadway, 10th Floor

10gen will be providing drinks for a celebration of the hackNY community, an event to help raise funds "for the future tech innovators of New York City," and keep kids off Wall Street as the slogan goes. We had a pretty great time at the last hackNY fundraiser. But if nothing else, it's a chance to peep Foursquare's sweet office digs.

The Webutante Ball
Wednesday, May 16th, 8pm-11:55pm
Marquee

Don't pretend like you don't want to see the digerati all dolled up. The Webutante Ball is in its 4th year, and it's not really getting any cooler, but there will be lots of drinks. The "prom committee" is packed with NYC tech allstars, like Ben Lerer, Dave Tisch, plus old school fameball Julia Allison.

Walkabout NYC
Friday, May 18th, 1pm-6pm
187 Lafayette St. 6th Floor

If you're a fan of the Roger Mag, or just an interior design nut, you'll probably want to take some time to hit up Walkabout NYC, an open house of startup offices around the city. The lineup includes Betaworks, Gilt Groupe, Tumblr and Facebook, among many others.

Future of Media Panel
Friday, May 18th, 1pm-2pm
20 Cooper Sq. at 5th st. (NYU's journalism HQ)

Oh look, another panel to discuss the future of an industry about which no one has the slightest clue. Yay. But! The lineup is packed with A-list names in both media and tech, including Buzzfeed's Jonah Peretti, Thrillist's Ben Lerer and Jezebel's Jessica Coen. As long as everyone's candid about the real state of things, we think it should prove pretty entertaining.

10. Lauren Leto's bio neglects to mention her current company, Bnter, or the fact that it is fun to do drunk.

9. Rachel Sklar is not a founder of Hashable.

8. Nor is Ms. Sklar the world's cuddliest feminist reporter. That would be Mike Taylor. "The point is not even arguable," Mr. Taylor said.

7. The piece asserts that "with his sandy blondish locks and tall, lanky frame, Chris Poole is a veritable geek Adonis—a total catch for any gorgeous geekette." In fact, he's "as cute and wholesome as a teen idol, with wide green eyes."

6. The piece neglects to mention Mr. Poole's start-up, Canv.as.

5. 4chan has a lowercase 'c.'"

4. The 4chan army is not at Mr. Poole's every control open-apple command. He's said that several times.

3. The article neglects to mention that Andrew Mason and Groupon are the N'Sync of websites.

2. Pretty sure some other people helped Soraya Darabi found Foodspotting.

1. TOMS shoes is not a tech company.