Mr. Steinberg probably saw this coming just as much as the feds did, considering he was recently placed on leave after Mr. Cohen attempted to pay $616 million to resolve two previous insider trading cases. The larger settlement of $602 million was rejected by a federal judge because of a provision that would have allowed SAC to avoid stating that it had committed any wrongdoing.

The much smaller $14 million settlement was related to tradings made by Mr. Steinberg involving tech giants Dell and Nvidia. According to former analyst, Jon Horvath, who agreed to a guilty plea last September after being arrested, Mr. Steinberg made millions on insider trades on Dell and Nvidia after receiving confidential financial information from Mr. Horvath.

In a move that would have made Gordon Gecko proud, Mr. Horvath forwarded an August 2008 e-mail to Mr. Steinberg with Dell's financial data a few days before the company's quarterly earnings announcement.

”I have a secondhand read from someone at the company. Please keept to yourself as obviously not well known,” Mr. Horvath wrote according to the Times.

The federal government's white whale, of course, is Mr. Cohen. According to Forbes, he is the 35th richest man in the United States, with a net worth of $8.8 billion.The SEC has previously gone after other portfolio managers focused on other markets, including one last November that resulted in a $602 million settlement. And what does Mr. Cohen do now that the prospect of prison time could very well be in his future? What any logical billionaire does! Buy a Picasso painting for $155 million and an oceanfront estate in East Hampton for $60 million.

Gotcha! (Photo: In the Capital)

Today Facebook will probably be unveiling a revamp of its News Feed, complete with content-specific streams like a photo feed. Also: bigger, better ads. [TechCrunch]

"Nightmare bacteria" are officially a thing, resistant to antibiotics and haunting your worst hospital-related dreams. So if anybody's got any really clever public-health ideas, now's the time. [Washington Post]

"Once I emerged from a coding bender with a fine, downy moss on my legs and trunk, a colony of moths in my hair. Are you honestly ready to bring such a symphony of efficiency to a halt?" [Tim Sniffen]

The EU has no intention of letting U.S.-based tech companies ignore its stringent data-protection laws. [Bloomberg]

But the EU might also be walking back some of its strictest rules. [ZD Net]

Apparently Carl Icahn is being a party-pooper about Dell's attempt to go private. [Reuters]

Mr. Dell (Photo: Wikipedia)

Dell's board of directors were said to vote last night on a $23 billion deal to take the company private, with private equity firm Silver Lake Management, Microsoft and company founder Michael Dell among the key players. [AllThingsD]

Competition between on-demand taxi service startups continues to simmer. Later this month, New York City will launch its pilot program for e-hailing yellow cabs. Meanwhile, Uber competitor Hailo is launching a subsidiary in Tokyo. [TechCrunch]

Nearly half of single women research prospective dates on Facebook before they meet, according to Match.com. Also in the survey, promiscuous sexters! Thirty-two percent of singles have sent a sext, while 51 percent of singles have received a sext, which by our math means some of you are sending more than your fair share.   [Mashable]

A group of Florida investors is hosting something called the "pitch house" at the Startup Conference next week. Sounds like a pilot. [Nibletz]

Benchmark Capital's Bill Gurley, Chamath Palihapitiya of Social + Capital Partnership and SurveyMonkey's Dave Goldberg talked Venture Capital and IPOs.  [Bloomberg Television]

Twitter is hiring engineers to beef up security after a recent hacking attempt. [Wired]

This is the first pic that comes up when you Google "Dell dude." (Photo: DKMedia.net)

The "Dude, you're getting a Dell!" guy gained a modicum of fame in the early aughts for popping up in random Dell commercials and surprising enterprising college students and old people with a Dell computer. (Really? This? I asked for an Apple Powerbook...)

Now, Ben Curtis has reemerged onto the tech scene, exciting dudes everywhere with a nostalgia boner for old computers. And Mr. Curtis claims he knows exactly how to solve Dell's recent financial woes: hire him back, obvi.

“I think they’re making a huge mistake and simply need to bring back the Dell Dude!” Mr. Curtis told Bloomberg. "That’s it. That’s all they need to do. If they brought me back, their sales, stock and media presence would skyrocket. That is by FAR the smartest move they could make."

Mr. Curtis was fired from Dell after he was caught buying a bag of weed while wearing a kilt, which seems like the most dude thing you can possibly do. But unfortunately for Mr. Curtis, Dell was none too impressed with having a stoner for a spokersperson. Since his 2003 firing, Mr. Curtis has been bouncing around from one low-budge acting gig to the next, and is clearly anxious to get back onto TV screens everywhere.

Dude, are you sure this recent bid for relevancy has nothing to do with your struggling acting career? Either way, publicly begging for your old job back is only slightly less humiliating than a massive tech company getting advice from its former bro spokesperson.

(Photo: Rex Sorgatz)

Social media is making Google search less useful. Facebook isn't ready to compete, at least not yet. Welcome to the search desert. [BuzzFeed]

If you're a PC maker who wasn't so thrilled when Microsoft launched the Surface, how exactly do you feel about news that the software maker might invest $2 billion in the deal to take Dell private? [Bloomberg]

Apple releases its quarterly earnings report today, and your guess is as good as ours. As far as what earnings mean for the company's stock, which has plummeted nearly 30 percent since September? How about something in the $1 to infinity range?[@ReformedBroker]

Two Bitcoin casinos say their businesses are minting profit. [Ars Technica]

Larry Page said that Google Fiber was not a "hobby" for his company, during a conference call to discuss quarterly earnings. Cruelly, he didn't say anything about when the company might expand the product beyond Kansas City. [Los Angeles Times]

Obama campaign staffer Ashley Arenson, who served as director of innovation and integration during the recent presidential election, has joined Soho Tech Labs in the role of general manager. [AllThingsD]

StumbleUpon is laying off 30 percent of its staff in a move to achieve profitability in the first quarter of this year. [TechCrunch]

A British government agency fined Playboy about $160,000 for failing to install adequate controls to prevent minors from accessing pornographic videos. Seems like a slap on the ... wrist. [Ofcom]

Private equity firm Silver Lake Management is said to be close to lining up financing to take Dell private, with a deal possible as early as next week. [Bloomberg]

And surprise, surprise, when SEC filings maven Michele Leder compiled her list of the year's most egregious bits of corporate hide-and-go seek, guess what dominated the list? Tech.

The highlights:

The $30 million package Zynga gave Barry Cottle to come over from Electronic Arts and fill the role of chief revenue officer at the social gaming company.

A February filing in which Netflix became what Ms. Leder believes to be the first company ever to file SEC documents averring a need to “repair the damage to our brand"—after the company ticked off customers by changing its pricing structure.

Yahoo's laughable claim that Jerry Yang resignation from the company's board of directors had nothing to do with any disagreements he may have had with others at the company.

The Dell executive who got $1.9 million in relocation expenses to move 200 miles from Round Rock to Plano, Texas.

Better luck next year.