General Petreaus and his alleged mistress, Paula Broadwell. (Photo: Paulabroadwell.com)

At least one chapter in the Shakespeare-worthy downfall of former general and CIA director David Petraeus is ending with a whimper. Mr. Petraeus's biographer and one-time paramour Paula Broadwell will not be charged with cyberstalking--the very accusation that led to her affair with Mr. Petraeus becoming public knowledge.

Ms. Broadwell's lawyer gave an official letter indicating as much to the media. In the letter, United States Attorney Robert E. O'Neill wrote that "no federal charges will be brought in the Middle District of Florida relating to alleged acts of cyber-stalking."

Mr. Petraeus's and Ms. Broadwell's true relationship came to light after Ms. Broadwell began sending anonymous emails to Florida socialite Jill Kelley, using the ominous screen name, "kelleypatrol." Alarmed, Ms. Kelley told F.B.I. special agent Frederick W. Humphries II about the harassment and Agent Humphries urged the F.B.I. to investigate. After that, as Wired reports, it was probably just a matter of time:

Whatever its origins, the FBI cyberstalking inquiry lit a flame that eventually torched Petraeus. Investigators soon discovered that Broadwell was behind "kelleypatrol"; that Petraeus and Broadwell passed each other information using drafts saved in an email account both had access to; that Broadwell’s hard drives or email accounts contained sensitive information; and, of course, that Broadwell and Petraeus conducted an affair.

This drama, tailor-made for a Lifetime/Military Channel crossover, isn't completely over. The CIA is still trying to determine whether Mr. Petraeus took advantage of the perks for his position while in a relationship with Ms. Broadwell, and the Defense Department is still poring over the voluminous email correspondence between Jill Kelley and Marine General John Allen, who replaced Mr. Petraeus as commander of U.S. forces in Afghanistan.

Paula Broadwell may be the only one who could claim to see a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel as she likely plots a new memoir about  her own "education."

Thnks fr th Mmrs (Photo: flickr.com/katerha)

What are you doing? Are you looking up his name again? Well, just stop it. Unfriend your ex and never search his name again, because so august an institution as the New York Daily News says so:

While not entirely surprising or unexpected, a new British study confirms what many broken hearts already know -- deep down, anyway: that the cyberstalking of an ex is nothing more than self-sabotage, disrupting a person’s ability to heal and move on with his or her life.

According to Brenda Wiederhold, editor-in-chief of the journal Cyberspychology, Behavior, and Social Networking and part-time Captain Obvious:

“Just as real life contact with ex-partners may inhibit growth, healing, and well-being, so may virtual contact.”

Unfortunately, the article contains no actionable advice for how to restrain oneself from the aforementioned cyberstalking. Something between deleting your Facebook and joining a nunnery should suffice.