Meanwhile in Canada
In case you didn’t spend the hours between noon and 2pm glued to your TV, the Canadian and American men’s Olympic hockey teams just faced off in a HIGHLY anxiety-provoking semifinal game.
Team Canada supporters took to Twitter attempting to be vicious and competitive with their pro-U.S. rivals, but — rather unsurprisingly — the results were still prettttttty polite:
Meanwhile in Canada
To celebrate completing her first year in office, a Canadian politician hosted a (very lovely and polite) Reddit Ask Me Anything last week. And you thought we Canadians hadn’t mastered electricity yet.
Americans may be gearing up to use facial recognition software to find out if their friends are serial killers, but meanwhile it Canada, they’re using it to track down their lost puppies.
According to the Globe and Mail, Vancouver dog shop cofounder Philip Rooyakkers has developed an app called Positive Identification of Pets—or PiP, for short—that helps tech-savvy Canadians find their lost cats and dogs.
Attack of the Clones
Disgusted by his son’s choice to play with an iPad over playing outside, a dad from Guelph, Ontario has decided to ban all technology in his house that wasn’t made before 1986—the year he and his girlfriend were born.
“We’re parenting our kids the same way we were parented for a year just Read More
“Many Beatles fans remember where they were when they heard John Lennon was shot. I hope they also live to hear the day he was given another chance,” is a thing that was actually said by a Canadian dentist who plans to clone John Lennon using DNA extracted from the late Beatle’s rotting tooth. #Science.
Social media lesson, fellow millennials: If you’re going to steal something for “fun,” don’t brag about it on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter or even Pinterest, dummies.
Unfortunately (for her), an Instagram user going by @gidalaqua did just that after she swiped a homemade sign in the shape of a cupcake from Winnipeg cake store Cake-ology. She posted pics of herself grinning with the cupcake sign, with the caption, “Last night tho [crying laughing Emoji] stole a cupcake sign YOLO lmfao.”
App for That
It’s a common problem: you’re walking down the street in a European tourist destination and you come upon a giant fridge with a beer logo on it.
But try as you might, you can’t get it to open. Instead of buying a beer elsewhere, you beckon fellow passersby to show them the cruel appliance. A crowd forms. Finally, a Canadian walks up, slides her passport into the high-tech fridge scanner, and the fridge pops open. Free beer for everyone! (Shhh, don’t worry about laws against drinking in public.)
Be careful, crappy drivers of the world: a new app will encourage passersby to snitch on your dicey park job in exchange for a cut of the parking ticket.
The app, SpotSquad, is being developed by the least fun tech startup in the world, based in Winnipeg, Canada, according to Fox News. Its primary users will presumably be money-grubbing killjoys and people who didn’t get into the police academy.
Darwin the Japanese macaque, better known as “Ikea Monkey,” is caught in the middle of a vicious custody battle, according to The Telegraph. Darwin rose to fame when a Twitter user tweeted a picture of him wearing a fancy shearling coat and a diaper in a Toronto Ikea parking lot. He even reached Peak Meme status when he was parodied by every lady’s favorite porn star, James Deen.
Did you know the Royal Canadian Mint, the agency that produces Canada’s money, has been “actively monitoring the evolution of currency and payment technologies for a number of years”? They have! And they’ve developed their own digital currency, the MintChip.
Apparently the Mint recently diverted some of its research and development funds—who knew mints had these?—into coding MintChip, which uses NFC technology similar to Google Wallet. Today the Mint announced a competition for developers in North America. Build apps with MintChip, which is still in the experimental phase, and you can win $50,000 in gold bullion.