instagram that shit
All the Single Traders
This shouldn’t surprise us, because Beyoncé keeps tighter control of her image than pretty much any other star. But it’s still disappointing to learn that her latest Instagram photo appears to have been edited for maximum ***flawless-ness.
The telltale signs: the iPhone and wine glass on the table both look warped. This makes it seem like the singer (or more likely, her “people”) used editing software to alter her thigh. Or she just likes her pinot from an oblong glass! It’s impossible to tell.
‘What do people like? Beyonce. What do people check a lot? Stocks.’ Enter Bey Trader. Read More
This past December, Beyonce shocked the industry by dropping her fifth album on iTunes with no advance notice, and still managed to rocket to the #1 spot on the charts. The album’s surprise launch resulted in a slew of mainstream press. What you may not have heard is that within days of its release, rock band We the Kings managed to knock Beyonce’s album off the #1 spot on the iTunes charts–due to the millions of fans they’d cultivated on YouTube.
The successes we’re seeing with bands like We The Kings are becoming increasingly common as YouTubers with established audiences use the site to build their brands according to their own vision. When Billboard magazine began including YouTube views in its Hot 100 rankings chart in February 2013, it created new opportunities for music’s Davids to topple traditional industry Goliaths.
You mean coitus? Like all humans, we’ve been learning every single track on the surprise digital album (#tech) recently released by one Beyoncé Knowles‐Carter.
Knowing Beyoncé and Jay‐Z are big fans of hanging out in Paris, we weren’t surprised to hear some French on our favorite track, “Partition.”
Rachel Haot, the city’s chief digital officer, doesn’t need to worry about her future employment plans. Gov. Andrew Cuomo has hired her to take a similar in his administration. [New York Times]
Bow down: Unless your name is Beyonce, people are done buying your stupid music online. [AllThingsD]
Tomorrow morning, Vine users will start having the option of creating their own URLs utilizing their usernames. [The Next Web]
Even hackers will do anything to bypass pay walls. This time, they reportedly hacked into the Washington Post‘s servers and had access to employee’s usernames and passwords. [Daily Dot]
Both CEO Mark Zuckerberg and board member Marc Andreessen are selling millions of their Facebook shares. [BI]
Beyoncé blew Instagram’s new product announcement out of the water in the middle of the night when she used the platform to announce a surprise new album that not a damn soul expected.
Looks like Blue Ivy will be kept in ponies and designer toddler duds for the foreseeable future. Beyoncé recently rolled out high-profile campaigns with Pepsi and H&M, and now it seems Jay-Z is hustling for some of that tech boom dough. According to the New York Post, he’s currently negotiating an enormous deal to promote Samsung.
Maybe while he’s at it he can rescue Alicia Keys from BlackBerry?
Were you thwarted in your attempt to get Taylor Swift tickets? Are you pouting outside a Rihanna concert? Well, you’re not alone, and the New York Times has located a target for your rage: BOTS.
The Times reports that, according to Ticketmaster, bots “have been used to buy more than 60 percent of the most desirable tickets for some shows,” which explains why you couldn’t get Beyonce tickets. A rep from Bowery Presents told the Times they sometimes have 20 percent no-shows for sold-out concerts, and they’re prime tickets. “It’s speculators who bought a bunch of seats and didn’t get the price they wanted.”
Crime and Punishment
Power Tumblr User and Self-Quantifying Empress Beyonce riseth once again. In a new one-minute spot for R.C. Cola, Bey dances and violently gyrates against the floor with previous iterations of herself. But one star manages to almost upshine the queen herself: the cyborg glove, which made its debut in the “Single Ladies” video, is back with a vengence. Leave it to Beyonce to make even wearable tech look cool.
What does it take to join the Illuminati, a secret society of power players that Internet conspiracy theorists believe are looking to take over the world?
Being super rich and famous helps–just look at Queen Beyonce, who supposedly flashed the Illuminati sign (a triangle) during her Super Bowl halftime performance. Other rumored illuminati members are Bey’s hubby Jay-Z and their child Blue Ivy, Barack Obama, Angelina Jolie and Adele. It’s an elite crew primarily comprised of music legends, so it’s no surprise that many aspiring musicians wish to ascend the Illuminati ranks. It’s highly discouraged, however, to shoot someone in order to do so.