Betabeat » David Shapiro

Energizer Is Selling This Charger for a BlackBerry That Doesn’t Exist

David Shapiro — Thu, 26 Apr 2012 14:41:24 -0400

Yesterday I was dropping off some film at the Walgreen's on Astor Place when I saw the Energizer Energi To Go, a portable cell phone charger, which has a photo on the packaging of a BlackBerry that doesn't exist:
That thing that looks like a BlackBerry on the cover is actually a BlackBerry 8700 with a trackball. But every BlackBerry 8700 (8700c, 8700g, 8700r) has a scroll wheel on the side, not a trackball in the middle, which relegates this representation to the world of fantasy, right next to the BlackBerrys with front-facing cameras.

Plenty of other BlackBerrys have trackballs, but not the 8700, which you can see here. This is like if you walked into a store that was selling aftermarket iPad covers, but the iPads on the packaging had clickwheels to avoid getting cease-and-desisted by Apple.

Here's an illustration of exactly what's wrong:

So why is Energizer using this fake/Photoshopped BlackBerry to sell its generic smartphone chargers? It could be because RIM doesn't want Energizer selling aftermarket chargers and wouldn't grant the company the license to use a photo of a real BlackBerry, or perhaps Energizer didn't want to pay for the right to use a photo of a real BlackBerry, or maybe Energizer didn't want consumers to think this would only work on actual BlackBerrys.

Anyway, no matter the reason, Energizer has created a FrankenBerry that any BlackBerry connoisseur would love to own. They've also made themselves look pretty bush league for a $4.7 billion corporation with this shit.

David Shapiro is Betabeat’s gadgets correspondent and the pseudonymous blogger behind Pitchfork Reviews Reviews.

Beyonce’s Incredibly Expensive/Rare BlackBerry Just Shitted On Your Cell Phone’s Life

David Shapiro — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 14:47:52 -0400

If you just got the iPhone 4S and modified it with like a glowing Apple logo on back and you're walking around thinking you're a cool guy with a somewhat unique cell phone, well, I just saw this picture of Beyonce walking around in Brooklyn with Blue Ivy in a Baby Bjorn, and she's carrying a BlackBerry so expensive and rare that it makes you and your phone look like total chumps:

That's the BlackBerry Bold P'9981, BlackBerry's specialty model designed by Porsche, which is only available in the UK and the Middle East:

Internally it's basically the same thing as the commonly available BlackBerry Bold 9900/9930, but on the outside (aka what matters), it's special enough to cost $2,145.00 ($2,079.00 on eBay).

Actually, Beyonce needs to upgrade to 24K gold-plated one, which costs $7,642. That would be sick.

David Shapiro is Betabeat’s gadgets correspondent and the 23-year-old pseudonymous blogger behind Pitchfork Reviews Reviews.

Make Hundreds of Dollars Off Microsoft, AT&T and Nokia Bending Over Backwards to Sell Windows Phones

David Shapiro — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 17:53:57 -0400

The Nokia Lumia 900.

The first flagship Windows Phone, the Nokia Lumia 900, comes out on April 8th; and because the companies behind it are so eager to get people to try a Windows phone after decades of besmirching that brand, they're discounting it massively. This enormous, beautiful, and somewhat revolutionary phone costs $449-$499 without a plan, but you can get it at AT&T for $99. Walmart has it for free if you don't already have AT&T service and $49 if you do.

What this means for you, unsavory person, is that you can take advantage of the "generosity" of these companies and make possibly a couple hundred dollars.

If you buy the phone at Walmart for free with a two-year contract and the cheapest plan options ($39.99 for talk/text and $20 for mandatory data), you've dropped $59.99 (plus tax, shipping's free). Add the $315 it'll cost you to cancel the plan, and you've spent $374.99 on a phone that retails for, at very least, $449. On eBay, the phone's going for between $488 and $729, and that price will certainly come down in the weeks after the phone's release. But, if you pre-order online now, Walmart and AT&T will ship the device to you on April 5th—so you can get it before anyone else, which means that huge eBay premium will still be intact as the phone won't be officially released for another three days. Act fast!

David Shapiro is Betabeat's gadgets correspondent and the 23-year-old pseudonymous blogger behind Pitchfork Reviews Reviews.