Survey Says

People Would Rather Look for the End of the Internet Than Get a Good Night’s Sleep

There's only so much Graham Norton one can handle.
Literally us. (Photo: Flickr)

Literally us. (Photo: Flickr)

If your pre-sleep ritual is surfing the Internet until your eyes fall out, you’re not alone. A new survey reveals that practically the entire country of Britain falls asleep cradling their laptops with 9 out of 10 of them admitting that they would rather forgo a relaxing night’s sleep so they can discover the end of the Internet.

The survey, conducted by a sleeping pill brand, surveyed 2,000 people about their bedtime Internet manners. Nearly a quarter claimed to be “addicted” to checking Twitter, Facebook and emails (don’t be prude, admit you surf porn too, Britain!) because they don’t want to feel FOMO. Just ten percent of them described their sleep as “good,” further proving that the British are never impressed with anything.

As a result, 60 percent said they experience a “broken sleep” several nights a week. Part of the problem is all that peering at the screens is screwing with the brain’s development of melatonin since the blue light being emitted from the devices mimics daylight.

The discovery is leaving a British sleep expert very concerned. “As technology to keep us connected improves, we face a new battle with trying to switch off at night,” said Dr. Chris Idzikowski. We’re kind of scared of his stern response when he hears about sleep texting.

But by now you know the best solution is to power off an hour before bedtime and leave the devices in another room but, come on, those Twitter canoes aren’t going to row themselves.

Follow Jordan Valinsky on Twitter or via RSS. jvalinsky@observer.com