Attack of the Clones

Canadian Dentist Plans to Clone John Lennon Using Disgusting Rotten Tooth

Oh bla dee, oh bla da, life goes on...even once you're dead and all that remains of your body is an old brown tooth.
"OMG can't wait 2 b cloned one day #tooth" - John Lennon, 1964 (Photo: Getty)

“OMG can’t wait 2 b cloned one day #tooth” – John Lennon, 1964 (Photo: Getty)

“Many Beatles fans remember where they were when they heard John Lennon was shot. I hope they also live to hear the day he was given another chance,” is a thing that was actually said by a Canadian dentist who plans to clone John Lennon using DNA extracted from the late Beatle’s rotting tooth. #Science.

Dr. Michael Zuk, of Edmonton, Alberta, reportedly bought the really freaking nasty tooth in 2011 for $30,000 at a U.K. auction.

For a while, the self-proclaimed “crazy dentist” used the tooth to fuel The John Lennon Tooth project, a charity initiative designed to raise awareness about oral cancer (though perhaps a well-designed pamphlet or two would have also worked, and would not have involved a dead person’s decaying body part).

For his next project, Dr. Zuk will apparently be working with American scientists to extract the genetic code from the tooth, and—ideally—use it to bring Mr. Lennon back to life and make human cloning a reality. “To potentially say I had a small part in bringing back one of Rock’s greatest stars would be mind-blowing,” Dr. Zuk said.

But even if Mr. Lennon were physically resurrected, would his non-physical traits still be the same? What if these doctors spend the next forty years cloning Mr. Lennon’s body, only to discover that their final product isn’t actually all that interested in music this time around, and quite frankly would much rather spend his second life playing Yu-Gi-Oh! or something?

Additionally, we haven’t heard any encouraging updates from those wooly mammoth people or that weird billionaire who said he was going to clone dinosaurs for a probably dangerous theme park, so we’re not holding our breath.

Follow Jordyn Taylor on Twitter or via RSS. jtaylor@observer.com