Remember the good old days when all you needed to be a powerful and popular tween was a mass of shiny hair, a gaggle of wannabe friends and your dad’s credit card? Times have changed. Now a tween’s sense of importance is derived primarily from the amount of Tumblr URLs he or she has amassed. Oh, what a cruel world.
The Daily Dot reports on the phenomenon of Tumblr URL hoarding, wherein power-hungry tweens collect hundreds of Tumblr URLs just for the thrill of it. Tumblr makes it super easy to add secondary domains to your main account, so the practice of amassing dumb URLs is pretty easy. They’re not really worth any money, but the rush you get from cybersquatting on domains like “the-perks-of-being-a-time-lord” cannot be underestimated.
Tweens are collecting URLs primarily to demonstrate their “status and power,” one psychologist told The Daily Dot. Tweens think that hoarding domains will make them more popular, so hoarding Tumblr URLs is basically the new hoarding beanie babies.
“Oh man, I’ve heard of people having over 400 URLs,” a user named Jess told The Daily Dot. “As I hoarded URLs I never really thought about what exactly I was doing. It’s kind of like a race. A race to see who can get it first. And when you type that URL in and it’s not taken. It’s the best thing in the world because it is all yours, forever.”
Somebody tell this girl she could get the same cheap thrill from joining an after-school trivia team or something.