Today in rich people things: the custom $100 million euro superyacht that Steve Jobs had commissioned to be built prior to his death has been impounded in Amsterdam, where it will spend the holidays dejectedly picking up women in the red light district in an attempt to distract itself from the startling financial reality that has befallen it.
Phillipe Starke, the French designer of the sleek minimalist yacht, claims he has only received 6 million of his 9 million euro commission, and had the yacht repo’d until Steve Jobs’ estate coughs up the dough. The yacht, named Venus, has been reportedly heard muttering to other boats in the harbor about why he couldn’t have been built for P. Diddy instead.
The vessel is not allowed to leave Amsterdam until the payment dispute is settled, which is fine, said the boat, because “they have weed here!”
Reached for comment, the yacht grumbled, “What was that about ‘staying foolish?’”