They See Me Trollin'

Accused of Illegally Downloading Porn, Man Demands Public Apology

But he also wants money, because sometimes "sorry" just won't cut it.
 Accused of Illegally Downloading Porn, Man Demands Public Apology

The Google Image results for “porn” are too vile, so here is a “lady flower.” (Photo: flickr.com/danseprofane)

Plenty of people have been sued for illegal downloading. But an increasing number of defendants are basically giving plaintiffs the finger, in the form of countersuits. Today TorrentFreak offers up yet another example, that of a put-upon Colorado man who’s filed a lengthy countersuit demanding millions in damages and also a public apology in a local newspaper.

Presumably he also faxed the company a handwritten note saying, “And that’s what’s up.”

A bit of background, for those of you who’ve never had the misfortune of being caught downloading something illegal: While the RIAA and its big-label ilk have backed off of lawsuits as a tactic for fighting illegal downloading, several porn companies are still using that particular stick. Only rather than dragging the case to trial, companies oh-so-kindly offer their prey a chance to settle for just a few thousand dollars, thereby avoiding becoming “that dude who got sued for downloading Anal Sluts Vol. XVIIX.” 

Well, Jeff Fantalis wasn’t having any of that. He’s slapped the company with a 53-page counterclaim, alleging “defamation, the intentional infliction of emotional distress, abuse of process and invasion of privacy.” He would like a million dollars in damages for each claim. Go big or go home, we suppose.

In the course of the filing, Mr. Fantalis denies everything in Malibu Media’s lawsuit. For starters, tracing illegal downloads to specific IP address is by no means a foolproof method of identifying the actual downloader. He also denies that he has ever seen a pornographic movie in his entire life, which… if you say so, buddy. He even goes far as to suggest that pornography can’t even be copyrighted, claiming, according to TorrentFreak, that “explicit porn doesn’t fit the basic principle that copyright should promote ‘the progress of science’ or ‘useful arts.'”

But besides the money, Mr. Fantalis would also like “a public retraction and apology in a local newspaper ad, not smaller than a quarter page.” He has a few other requirements, as well:

“…[The advertisement] shall specifically retract the claims of the Complaint, acknowledge that Plaintiff wrongfully brought this lawsuit against the Defendant, state that this lawsuit was groundless, acknowledge that the Defendant had not infringed in any manner against the plaintiff and that Defendant is innocent in this matter, and apologize to the Defendant…”

We’ve reached out to Mr. Fantalis for comment and will update if we hear anything back.

Frankly, we’re just amazed anyone anywhere is still bothering to download pornography. You guys know about YouPorn, right?

Follow Kelly Faircloth on Twitter or via RSS. kfaircloth@observer.com