Yo Zuck!

Listen up, Silicon Valley. Kara Swisher says you can "go the f**k back to sleep"—it's gonna be awhile. Ms. Swisher, who started her (since abandoned) gonzo live-blog on AllThingsD at 4:45am PST, the S-1 filing—and all its mystical contents—won't come "until this afternoon, after the markets close, at the earliest."

In the meantime, we're just spitballing over here.

• Facebook S-1 Filing So Potent, Impregnates Tech Blogger With A Single Scroll

• Peter Thiel Reaches Singularity

• MySpace Tom Owns Facebook Stock LOL Wut?

• Lloyd Blankfein Lies Gently Weeping

• Nothing Will Ever Be The Same Again

• Wait, Where Is the Surprise Ending?

• Links To Facebook S-1 Filing Mysterious Disabled On Google+

• Larry Page Lies Gently Weeping

• Eduardo Saverin Should Not Be Allowed To Make His Own Financial Decisions

• Why Is Twitter Censoring #FB?

• How The Mayans Predicted Facebook's Ticker Symbol

• Winklevei Winklewon't

• Aaron Sorkin Furiously Pens Facebook Sequel: The Wonder Years

• Anonymous Takes Down SEC Site, Bloggers Lie Gently Weeping

• What Time Did Facebook IPO? [HuffPo]

• Facebook Likes NASDAQ [Mashable]

• Facebook Friends NYSE [Mashable]

• Dealbook's Evelyn Rusli: Told Ya So, Suckas

• REVEALED: FACEBOOK IPO CONFIRMED THIS IS DEFINITELY HAPPENING, YOU GUYS [Business Insider]

• Sleep-Deprived Kara Swisher Spends Murdoch Fortune on Facebook Stock, Stockpiles Scoops For Eternity