It’s like they knew. The day after this started, $GRPN spiked back up nearly $2, but plummeted shortly after Thanksgiving (a particularly treacherous stretch for $BDNK as well). After that, $GRPN inched its way back up to $24, before yo-yoing back down to shortly above $20, where we are today.
[Here it's worth noting that the way we can all tell I'm not lying is because my ridiculously overpriced gym has this scale thing where I log in with my thick, sausage-like fingerprint—yes, actually my fingerprint—and it uploads the results onto their website. Technology!]
The day the bet started I weighed in at 197.8. After Thanksgiving, it was back up to 199.6. This was not looking good for BDNK. Then December started: After a drop down to 194, it was back up to 197.4. A trip to Vegas, a trip to Miami, an extraordinary craving for Cuban sandwiches (especially for a Jew), a bunch of holiday parties, and a chest infection did not help matters. And yet, in the end, for their patience with market forces and confidence in their investment, $BDNK’s investors saw steady ass reduction (or: growth in BDNK’s market value).
With $BDNK results inverted to look like gains, the two charts for the last three months, side by side:
And there you have it.
Over the betting period, $GRPN saw a decrease in share price of 15.629%.
Over the betting period, $BDNK saw a decrease in mass (and thus, increase in share price) of 2.427 percent.
Unfortunately, I’m also not gaining any lean mass or really doing much for that whole “body fat” thing, which basically means I’m burning through my fat and into my muscle, which, if I continue on this route, will make me small and flabby instead of large and flabby. Which is really weird. I’ll look like that alien from American Dad. I should probably invest in a trainer.
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